Chapter 4: Dee Jay’s Party, part 2

Miguel: “Where were we now? Oh yeah! Last chapter, Dee Jay’s party got underway. We had heavy drinking, swearing, nudity, and Guile got the crap kicked out of him. We know continue this fanfic. Right now, Dhalsim and his buddies are about to perform a break dance number.”

Dee Jay: “Hey Dhalsim, are you guys ready?”

Dhalsim: “Hell yeah, let’s start up this shit now!”

(Dee Jay walks out to the crowd, grabs a microphone, and begins to speak into it.)

Dee Jay: “Ladies and gentlemen, can I have your attention please, I’d like to present to you, the awesome break dancing skills of the Master Blaster Break Dancers!”

(The lights turn low and the stage lights come on and shine on MBBD, all eight members of the crew start gliding along the stage in slick synchronization as the music plays. Their dance moves mesh real well with the music that is playing.)

Mega Man: “Wow, these guys kick ass!”

Maki: “They should choreograph some dance moves for music videos.”

Lucca: “Just not a Britney Spears video though, I hate that bitch!”

Britney: “Hit me baby one more time!”

(Lucca shoots Britney dead.)

Lucca: “That felt good!”

Miguel: “That’s cool, I hate that bitch too!”

(MBBD continues to show off their mad dancing skills, the crowd just gazing at them in awe. All of a sudden, the music changes to a hip-hop remix of Dhalsim’s music from Street Fighter II. The members of MBBD begin to pull off some break dancing moves, and then each of them decides to do one on their own.)

T. Hawk: “Whoa, this is awesome.”

E. Honda: “I agree Dhalsim and his crew sure know their stuff.”

(Sabrewulf begins to do a series of flares, followed by three somersaults, a helicopter move, and then spins up into the air, lands on his claws and spins around on them.)

Glacius: “Yeah, represent us well Sabrewulf!”

(Billy Hatcher then begins to spin around on the dance floor, he pulls a giant egg out and begins to break dance on top of it, then holds in his feet as he stands on his head, and spins around without even dropping it, he then flips on top of the egg and does a rooster crow. It is now Tiger’s turn, as he starts a series of flares, followed by a series of helicopter moves, then starts to head spin while cleaning his glasses, pretty cool if you ask me. Kano goes next, modifying his cannonball attack to look like a kick ass break dancing move. He throws a knife up into the air, spins around and then catches the knife in his mouth.)

Sub-Zero: “Holy shit that was clean!”

(Mog starts up his moves, he does a worm, the spins around on his hands and then flies up into the air and starts spinning around like a gyroscope and then casts a Fire spell as he break dances creating pyrotechnics around him.)

Mog: “Kupo!”

(It’s Luigi’s turn, he does a gyroscope like move, a couple of flares, a head spin, then does his Luigi Cyclone and at the end of it, shoots two green fireballs from his hands and makes them explode into fireworks.)

Luigi: “I’m a Luigi, number one!”

(Choi begins his break dancing, by doing a handstand and then a hand spin then goes into a long ass head spin that is so fast that he creates a tornado!)

Miguel: “Stop Choi! We don’t need you ruining the place and killing everyone!”

(Last but not least is Dhalsim; he starts off with the worm, then a head spin into a gyroscope. He then twists himself up like a pretzel and then continues to spin around and then springs into the air, untwists himself and shoots Yoga Fires in all eight compass directions and makes them explode into fireworks.)

Dhalsim: “Yoga!”

(All eight members of MBBD strike a pose.)

MBBD: “MBBD for life!”

(Everyone at the party gives them a standing ovation; MBBD goes into the crowd ready to party with everyone else. From out of nowhere, Will Ferrell runs onto the stage drunk and buck naked, everyone but Vega turns around in disgust.)

Vega: “OOH, that looks nice.”

Kenshi: “Are you insane, I’m glad I’m blind.”

Ferrell (slurred): “We’re going streaking!”

Miguel: “Uh no we’re not, you’re in the wrong place Mr. Ferrell.”

Ferrell: “Sorry!”

Miguel: “Now put some pants on!”

Ferrell: “I can’t, I didn’t bring any with me!”

Miguel: “Shit! I’m going to have to use my author powers!”

(I use my author powers, and clothes magically appear on Will Ferrell’s body, he is dressed in the forest ranger outfit he wore in “Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.”)

Ferrell: “Thanks Mr. Author!” (Ferrell leaves)

Hinata: “Screw this, I’m still going streaking!”

Guile: “Wait, I’ll join you.”

(Guile and Hinata leave the party and run naked in the streets.)

Miguel: “Ok, that was interesting, let’s go find Ken.”

(Ken Masters is off heading towards the kegs to go get another cup full of beer. Mai Shiranui also arrives near the kegs and looks at Ken as he is filling his cup.)

Mai: “Hey, you’re Ken Masters, aren’t you?”

Ken: “Yeah. And who might you be?”

Mai: “I’m Mai Shiranui, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

(Mai shakes Ken’s hand.)

Ken: “So you’re the hottest girl at SNK University, I’ve heard a lot about you (checks Mai out) and I can see why a lot of guys like you.”

Mai: “And why is that?”

Ken: “Two very obvious reasons.”

(Mai thinks for a second then laughs with Ken at what he said.)

Mai (fondling her breasts): “Yeah, they are awesome aren’t they?”

Ken: “Definitely awesome.”

Mai: “But you know, I wish someone would see me as a person, not just an object of lust.”

Ken: “I see what you mean, in fact I respect you for not being just another mindless groupie.”

Mai: “Thanks, it’s good to know that someone likes me for more than my body.”

Ken: “I do like girls, but now I’m after them for more than just sex, I’m not a pervert, that would be Guile.”

Mai: “Is Guile that idiot that went streaking with that slut Hinata?”

Ken: “That would be the guy, he likes easy girls and since Hinata is incredibly easy to score with he goes for that.”

Mai: “Is Hinata that easy?”

Ken: “Yes, she even tried to bribe Dr. Light with a BJ one time.”

(Flashback to a regular day in class, everyone is studying, the bell rings to let class out, the students shuffle to get out of their desks.)

Dr. Light: “Remember class, your essays on “Beloved” are due tomorrow!”

(Hinata walks up to Dr. Light’s desk.)

Hinata: “Dr. Light, can I please have an extension on my essay?”

Dr. Light: “No Hinata, I’m sorry I can’t make exceptions for anyone.”

Hinata: “I’ll give you a blow job if you give me an extension.”

All the men in class: “No fucking way!”

All the women in class (under their breath): “Slut.”

Dr. Light: “I cannot accept your offer and since you tried to bribe a teacher, I’m going to have to send you to Dean Akuma’s office.”

Hinata: “Ah shit!”

(Flashback ends; we see Ken and Mai laughing their heads off over that story.)

Mai: “I can’t believe she would give Dr. Light a BJ, he’s old.”

Ken: “He’s old, but he’s cool, but anyways, I thought you were head over heels for Andy Bogard, why aren’t you bugging him?”

Mai: “Ah, I see you know about that, well I used to like him until I found out the horrible truth about him.”

Ken: “And what might that be?”

Mai: “Andy is gay.”

Ken: “I might’ve known, you’ve been all over him for so long and he never made a move on you. When did you find out?”

Mai: “When I went to visit him one time, I saw him having sex with Vega. Although that would explain all the naked pictures of Vega that he had.”

Ken: “Yuck! Don’t put that image in my head! I don’t have anything against gay people, but I don’t wanna picture them doin’ the nasty.”

Mai: “Sorry.”

Ken: “It’s ok, I just never knew that Andy is an anal astronaut, but hey it’s not my business.”

(Ryu and Sean walk up to Ken.)

Ryu: “Hey Ken, come with us quick!”

Sean: “We’ve found Chun-Li, she’s talking with Sakura, hurry up!”

Ken: “Ok, I’m coming, I have to go Mai, talk to you later.”

Mai: “Ok, here’s my e-mail address, bye!”

(Ken follows Ryu and Sean over to a table where they see Chun-Li having a conversation with Sakura.)

Ryu: “What are you two talking about?”

Sakura: “About how Dee Jay is gonna rap pretty soon.”

Chun-Li: “Yeah, it should really be good.”

Sean: “I know it'll be good. Dee Jay should go pro.”

Ken: “He wants to, but he feels he should finish college first that way he has something to fall back on in case he doesn’t make it, but I’m sure he will make it.”

Ryu: “Hey I’m gonna go get a drink, anyone want one?” (Ryu winks at Sean and Sakura.)

Sakura: “Yeah, I’ll go get one too!”

Sean: “We’ll be right back, have fun you two.” (Ryu, Sean, and Sakura leave.)

Ken: “So I haven’t spoken to you since Rolento spewed all over you, what have you been up to?”

Chun-Li: “Practicing for soccer season, you?”

Ken: “Practicing for tennis, sparring with Ryu, the usual.”

Chun-Li: “Oh, ok.”

Ken: “Hey I was wondering if next Saturday, us two could hang out somewhere together?”

Chun-Li: “You mean like on a date?”

Ken: “Yeah, something like that.”

Chun-Li: “Sounds good, as long as it’s someplace Rolento wouldn’t go to.”

Ken: “Then it’s a plan.”

(Dee Jay walks onto the stage, and grabs the microphone again.)

Dee Jay: “Attention please, ladies and gentlemen, I’m going to rap for you guys now, please listen good. Viewtiful Joe, give me a beat to freestyle to.”

Viewtiful Joe: “Sweet beat a go-go baby! Mr. Dee Jay is in the hizhouse!”

(Viewtiful Joe puts on a beat, Dee Jay nods his head in approval, and he then begins to rap.)

Dee Jay (rapping): “My name is Mr. Dee Jay, I party like it’s my birthday, what is that you say, hit those rhymes Mr. Dee Jay. Well that is what I’m doing, so if you are booing, you gonna get maxed out! Gonna get blacked out! Make you scream and shout while I rap my heart out, show you what I’m all about, leave you without a doubt that I’m a great rapper you don’t flush down tha crapper. I’m like a black Slim Shady, better vocals then Greg Brady, hell I’m better then all tha Brady’s, and I love the ladies! I’ve more flows that you don’t know, you know, I’m not a ho, I don’t suck or blow. Capcom U is number one! You can’t beat the law son is something that Leon Kennedy would say, and we have sexy girlies and Vega is gay. But he’s cool in my book because he's not a crook like Ruby Heart, and he don’t fart. Say hi to Miguel who says X Box sucks! I agree cuz it’s a waste of 150 bucks. Go buy a Gamecube or a PS2, because that would be smartest thing you could do. Everybody rock the party, go ahead and drink Bacardi, oh shit I don’t have Bacardi, but still go enjoy the party! Viewtiful Joe, kill tha beat mon!”

(Viewtiful Joe stops the beat, the crowd gives Dee Jay a standing ovation and then the party continues Flash forward to the next morning, Dee Jay and E. Honda are lying on the ground very hung over.)

Dee Jay: “Oh mon, I feel like shit mon!”

E. Honda: “Me too, and we have to clean up the dorm, I don’t feel like getting up.”

Miguel: “I’ll help you guys out so don’t worry.”

(I use my author powers to clean the dorm and heal both guys of their hangovers.)

Dee Jay: “Hey thanks are you coming to the next party?”

Miguel: “Are all of them like this?”

E. Honda: “More or less.”

Miguel: “Sweet, of course I’ll be there.”

Dee Jay: “We’re gonna go watch Ryu and Ken spar in the gym, you coming?”

Miguel: “Yeah, I just gotta wrap up the chapter.”

E. Honda: “Ok, peace out!”

Miguel: “Wow, what a party! What will happen next? Will Dee Jay go pro? What does Ken have planned for his date with Chun-Li? Stay tuned for the next chapter of Capcom U!”

Author’s Note: Hoped you liked this chapter; well I’m off to start the next one. And yes Ryu and Ken are the main characters. Please read and review, peace!